Sand and Surf

Today was Andy's last day of leave, so we took some time and went to a State Park to explore. It was a very beachy state park (and it was another beach with waves!). We liked it a lot. Carolyn was more aware of the waves than the last time she was on the beach. She made all sorts of happy sounds. I put her little toes in the sand and let the water wash up over them. She was NOT so sure about that.

I still just love the waves. Something about them is just comforting. Things can feel just awful and listening to the waves will make me feel like life contains beauty even though it hurts sometimes.

Life is just funny. It's so big, and hard, and wonderful, and horrible. I'm limping through this grieving stuff. When I say that, you might think that means I'm sitting around crying all the time. In some ways, I wish that's what I was doing. I seem only able to cope. I know the feelings will come, and as my friend, Amber said, I may deal by doing my "Val type of quietly imploding" dealing.

I am thankful for this time. I am thankful for the beautiful house we're staying in. I'm thankful for Carolyn and Andy and this gift of extra time we have together. I would rather be with Mom still, but if we can't be, I'm glad we have this short time as the three of us. I am thankful for beaches, and holding hands, and ice cream.

I am sad, but I am thankful.

Does that all relate to the theme of 'Sand and Surf?' Oh well. If it all doesn't, at least the pictures do.